I was just on msn with my young niece. She got her UPSR (Primary Six) results today: 4As 1B. She was really upset with it.
"You did well. Look at those who failed, or kids who can't even afford to go to school. You've done well and consider yourself privileged," I told her. She replied, "You can't compare us." I asked why not. "It's not good to compare. Cos you'll end up being bitter or vain," she said. I was amazed. I never thought about that but yes, she was right. "Never compare or else you'll end up feeling bitter or vain, for there is always someone better or lesser than you." At her tender age, she could tell me, a 34-year-old, some good piece of advice.
In the end, it wasn't so much her results that made me so proud of her (well, yes, getting 4As 1B is really good already), but it was her reply to me earlier today---despite being really down and sad for not getting the 5As that she dreamt of, that she worked hard for---that really made me proud of her. I know that from here onwards, that she will grow up to be a wonderful person. A charismatic leader. An achiever.
And those words of hers for me, was good enough.
4 comments:
I agree, at such a tender age she's already deep. Lovely.
Getting that great result and yet she was dissatisfied has to do with our system here. We are too materialistic with academic achievement in that the past years the system highlighted too much with perfect results yet the kids are not balanced with other social and sports activities. Pity.
I was happy to have many B's and some C's during my time. I was an underachiever and because of this unenviable status, I made other people bitter or vain for comparing themselves with me. From then onwards, there was no turning back! I truly believed that life is a bed of roses for underachievers.
Hi Ruby - I think you're absolutely right there. There's no balance there anymore. And I feel that it's always a race against others. Just something to prove to the rest of the people, and unfortunately it tends to be the parents that are the ones who REALLY want to prove something to other people and in the process, the children became the victim of their selfishness.
Langkau -- I've always admired the underachievers. More so when we're talking about humility. But from an academic/intellectual standpoint, I don't think underachievers (nor late bloomers) are worst off than the overachievers. I believe they are the ones who has the best opportunity to learn the values of patience, persistence, perseverence, tolerance; whilst experiencing the meaning of self-discipline and control. Ultimately underachievers learn to respect him/herself first as a "normal" person just like anyone else. Of course overachievers can be in the same linkage. But heck, I'd like to think of myself as an underachiever too, so I know how it feels.
Post a Comment